Do People Really Love To Hate?

That's a very interesting question, isn't it? My husband and I got into a discussion earlier about this … which is what inspired me to write this post.

The conversation started out with us discussing some issues that I was upset with concerning Facebook. Then, the conversation turned into me stating how I didn't know how I could be a writer when I really don't like feedback and opinions. (Well, … probably more like negative feedback and opinions as I have never been good with constructive criticism. It's something I'm working on.) My husband said it didn't really matter whether or not people loved or hated me because they may still read my stuff anyways. Huh? * Baffled look * How could anyone want to like something or someone that they hate? My husband talked about people like Howard Stern and Rush Limbaugh and how people may not like them personally, but they will still tune in to find out what asinine thing they are going to come up with next.

Now, while that concept baffles me that people would want to listen to someone they can't stand, after thinking about it I realized that Tom might be on to something there. I mean, think about it. Look at the shows that people watch these days … all the reality shows. There are shows like Survivor and Jersey Shore where they are based off from backstabbing and drama, and sometimes backstabbing drama. Think about people like Snooki from Jersey Shore. You may not like her, … I'm not big on her myself … but if the right headline catches your eye, you may feel compelled to read it. Hell, the news media plays off from the junk all the time. They are always putting out news stories about celebrities like that … people we “love to hate.”

It's insanity … if you ask me. And since this is my blog, … I asked me. * wink and smile *

How, and why, would people want to pay attention to other people and things that they hate? Does this world really love conflict and drama? Do we really love to hate? Guess that's the way the world is … sad to say. Hmmmmm, ...

The Two Greatest Mother’s Day Gifts

As I pondered Mother's Day today while browsing on Facebook, I realized that I had so much more tom be grateful for. Not that I wasn't grateful already for these things, but it reiterated my gratitude and why I should be so grateful.

The first thing I am extraordinarily grateful for is my mom, Georgette, and the fact that I still have her around, especially since she's had different health issues for the past 20 plus years. I saw a lot of people on Facebook who had lost their moms and greatly missed them. It was so touching reading so many of their posts and it made me realize just how lucky I am to be able to spend today with my mother. I made my mother a homemade card and had my dad take a picture of us with my camera. I posted the picture of the two of us on my Facebook page. I also made sure that I told my mother just how much I love her. I think it meant a lot to my mom that I did these things and I feel good that I did, too. I don't want to take my mother or a single day of her life with us for granted.

The second thing I'm grateful for on this Mother's Day is my son, Thomas. He is my love and my life. He is my world. I am so grateful for his kind heart. He made my mom two pictures and made me a picture as well which expressed how much Thomas loves me. (His words.) I am grateful that despite what happened to me when Tommy was born, (preeclampsia and HELLP Syndrome), that I still have him. I known so many wonderful women who lost their babies from these horrible diseases. I am grateful Tommy's creative and intuitive spirit. I know I'm partial here, but, to me, he's the most amazing little boy in the whole world!

I hope that everyone in the world was able to receive these feelings of gratitude as well. Appreciate what you've got while you've still got it because you never know … one day you may not have it, or them, anymore. Happy Mother's Day, Moms … past, present, and future!

I Will Remember Him Fondly

On Thursday, April 19, 2012, the world lost a great musician.  His name was Greg Ham and he was the saxophonist, flutist, and keyboardist for the 1980’s group Men At Work.  Personally, I am a big fan of Men At Work’s and have been since I was kid … which is when they were a band.  It’s a very sad loss, especially since he was only 58 years old.

A couple of year’s ago, there was a scandal going on when Men At Work was accused of stealing the flute tune from one of their biggest hits, and one of my favorites, Down Under.  They lost the case and Greg feared that he would go down in music history as the man who stole a flute solo, and this seemed to be something that haunted Greg until his death.  Friends stated that he was not the same man after that.

Personally, I feel the case was shifty, but that’s just my opinion.  I mean, why sue someone over 20 years after the fact.  Strange, but true.  And I honestly don’t know every single detail about it.  My intuition just tells me it’s bull.  Again, … my opinion.

That being said, … I wanted to write a little note to Greg on here from a fan for life.

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Dear Greg,

You don’t know me, but I am a huge fan of Men At Work. I grew up with listening to your music … literally.  I feel sad because you were taken so soon from this world, but I know you will find true peace on the other side.

I know you had your fears about how people would remember you after the court case concerning your song Down Under.  I know it hurt you and you felt angry and embarrassed by it.  Please know that I am pretty sure that most of your fans will not think about this when they listen to your music.

I remember watching you in a concert that my dad had taped.  I was so amazed and impressed by the fact that you played so many different instruments and so beautifully.  I have always seen you as a very talented individual who created a wonderful legacy of beautiful music.  And this is coming from one of your fans!

I really, truly do believe that you will be remembered for the good contributions you left in this world and not something frivolous law suit.  I am sorry that it was so tough on you and that this world brought you so much pain when you tried to bring them joy.

Please know that your fans still love you and will always remember you fondly.  Please rest in peace, my friend. May we one day meet on the flip side so that I can Thank You personally for giving me the gift of your wonderful music with Men At Work.

Thanks for the music, Greg Ham!

With Love … Your fan,

Deanna

Expecting The Unexpected

25 Year’s Ago Today …

My beloved Uncle, Chester Smith, went to heaven.  I was only 12 … almost 13, years old, and when it happened, it truly hit me hard.  I was not prepared for what had happened, as many people aren’t when their loved one’s die suddenly.  All I knew was that one minute the man I had loved my whole life was there, then the next, he was gone.  He had had a major heart attack and died within a few hours from when the ambulance had picked him up in our front yard.  (My uncle lived in the house that my family and I now live in.  We lived behind him in a trailer at the time.) 

I had been sent over to my aunt’s home – on my mother’s side of the family; my uncle is on my father’s side.  I was over there for hours waiting to hear what was going on, but didn’t hear anything.  My cousin ended up taking me to the hospital to see what was going an and soon after arriving, I received a big shock that still hits me kind of hard to this day.  A very insensitive nurse came out told me the news by saying, “He died.”  Just like that.  “He died …”  And that was all she wrote.  I barely made it back to the elevator before bawling my eyes out.  It just hurt so bad.  My parents never meant for me to find out that way, and my aunt still feels bad to this day for having my cousin bring me there.  I’ve told her that I don’t blame her.  I mean, she didn’t know any more than I did.  We just wanted to know what was going on.

So, … anyways …

Wow!  It has been twenty-five years now.  It’s so strange.  It was after 1987 and that event that my life began to change.  It started when we moved from the trailer into my uncle’s house.  Since then, … so many “unexpected” changes have occurred in my life.  In 1989, I began my struggle with depression.  In 1997, I was stricken with panic disorder.  In 2004, I came down with severe preeclampsia and HELLP Syndrome and had to give birth to my son via c-section 6 weeks early.  I believe it was 2005 that I found out that I have a blood clotting disorder called prothrombin gene mutation. Then, in 2006, I was diagnosed with secondary unexplained infertility.

Most of what I thought would happen in my life so far hasn’t happened.  Of course, that doesn’t mean that something else won’t come along because it always does.  Do I get disappointed by things that happen in my life that are totally unexpected?  Sure, of course I do.  I’m still dealing with a lot of those feelings and emotions. 

What my point is in all of this is that things happen.  Some things are good … while some are downright terrible.  In life, we have to learn how to roll with the punches and keep on fighting the good fight, no matter what.  It’s about gaining resiliency and not letting the bad times ruin your life.  Take a good look at your obstacles and try to make the best of them.  There is always something good that can be found even in the worst of situations.  Sometimes you just have to look beyond the darkness to see the light.  One day the sun will shine again and it will shine on you.

© Deanna Smith-Powers/The Lotus Flower Butterfly Girl, 2012.